STUG Love Forever
by The Smiths Forever
Summary: I had this idea over Valentines Day. After reading some of the other STUG Fanfiction and watching a lot of YouTube, I had a story that I was itching to write. Ste and Doug had such amazing on-screen chemistry. Sadly, that can never really works out in a soap opera. If there was a Hollyoaks Movie, I could definitely see them walking off into the sunset hand-in-hand. AU bits here.
1. Chapter 1

I had this idea over Valentines so I thought that I would write a story for STUG Fans. Sorry Stendan Fans this is probably not your cup of tea. As always, Standard Disclaimers apply here. This is for my entertainment so I hope you enjoy. And maybe if we are all lucky there will be a happier ending for them.

It was at the Going Away Party, Doug saw it with his own eyes. His Ste, the man that he had married, was kissing his former lover, Brendan. Doug noticed that Ste was missing so he had gone to look for him.

Brendan had asked Ste into his office on some pretense. He wanted one more chance to convince Ste that he should really be with him. Doug stands for only a moment watching to his horror as Ste and Brendan kiss. He had believed Ste when he said that it was over. Doug believes that Ste will always want to be with Brendan. He doesn't stay to watch. He quickly leaves and goes back to the party.

Ste pushes back from Brendan and moves away from him, "what'd you do that for?"

"Because I love you Stephen and I always will," Brendan replies.

Ste looks at him and replies more angry than he intends, "little late for that don't you think. I married Doug. He is my life. You had your chance, no you had many chances, and you didn't want me. You played head games and even hit me. You just don't want to see me happy unless it's under your thumb. That ends today. In fact it ends now. Goodbye, Brendan."

Ste goes back to the Going Away Party, and Brendan stays in office getting ready to depart for Ireland.

He looks down and nods, "Goodbye to you Ste." He knows that it is truly over. Both he and Ste can move on.


	2. Chapter 2

The cab ride to the airport was quiet. Ste was thinking about the kids and Amy and how much he would miss them while in America. I love Doug, but I'm not so sure I can live without them, he thinks to himself. I gotta try this for us, for my Doug.

Doug stares out the window. He cannot get the kiss at the Chez Chez out of his head. He had retreated to that place in his mind where the event just plays over and over. Why can't I let this go? He says to himself, because Ste still loves him that's why. I will never be good enough so why keep trying. I love him, but I don't know that I can win this fight.

As Ste and Doug head into the airport terminal, Doug feels that he cannot go on any further. He stops Ste and Ste looks back at him with concern on his face.

You okay? Ste Says.

Doug has rehearsed his speech in his head. He wonders if he can say it without falling pieces.

"You were quiet in the car, Doug says, you miss him don't you."

"Who" Ste replies

"Brendan," Doug answers

Ste looks down at the floor. "Doug we've been over this. It is you I love not him. I don't want anything to do with him anymore." Ste says defiantly to Doug.

"But you kissed him," Doug says, "I saw you kiss at our going away party.

Ste doesn't respond. He had no idea that Doug saw Brendan kiss him. He honestly doesn't know how to reply so he stays silent.

Doug says, "You still love him."

"Doug" is the only words that Ste can get out. He is heart broken that Doug witnessed Brendan kissing him. He hates how this is hurting Doug.

Doug presses on while trying to hold back the tears, "Look here's a ticket for Dublin. That's where you need to be right now. I have to go to be with my dad."

A pleading Ste only looks at him and says, "Doug Please."

But Doug stuck to his guns, "No Ste just go, I don't want to hold you back from true happiness. I know that you are not happy with me. I will always love you, and I will always be there for you. If you decide it's me that you love, that's great. If not then it's for the best, and I will have to move on."

Both Ste and Doug were in tears. It was not easy to hear. It was clear that Doug had made up his mind. Ste knew that they could not have this conversation now. Doug needed to be with his dad. That was more important.

Doug hugs Ste and through his tear-strained voice says, "I am a better man for having loved you."

As Doug separates from Ste, he picks up his bag to board the flight to America. Ste stands there alone and heartbroken. The man that he loves is leaving him. The man that loved him so completely just walked away, and Ste could do nothing but watch. His head, his whole body ached after what just happened. Ste whispers to himself, This can't be then end. I will not let it. Ste just sits down and cries his heart out. Doug was gone. He felt so empty.


	3. Chapter 3

As Doug found his seat on the plane, the tears would not stop. When the plane left the ground, he put on his earbuds and tried to sleep. It was impossible. Only misery was there, but he had been miserable since he saw Brendan kiss Ste. He knew it was going to be a rough few days. First, Dad in the hospital and now Ste is gone. He thinks to himself, "God please help me. I don't know if I can do this."

Ste picks up his bags and wonders what he should do. He says to himself, there is nothing for me in Ireland besides an ex who I have no interest in seeing again. I know what Doug thinks, but I have to show him somehow that he is the one for me.

Ste goes to the ticketing desk and the airport and returns the ticket. He heads to get a cab. It is time to go home and think about how to fix things with his Doug. He knows it is not going to be easy. Doug is so insecure especially about Brendan. Well Ste thinks, I am going to do it, no matter what it takes I'm going to get my Doug back.

Doug's plane reaches the ground in New York, and Doug leaves the airport. Still feeling more like zombie than a living human being, Doug catches a cab to St. Vincent's Hospital to see his father.

Wow, he thinks, I'm home back in the States. But I wish I wasn't here, he thinks. Oh to be back in England at the deli with Ste. He interrupts himself. You can't think like that. Ste is out of the picture. He is with Brendan now. You have to be here for your dad.

Doug feels his phone buzz. It's a text message. For the first time in hours, he smiles.. "Hope you made it safely." It was from Ste. It's a bittersweet feeling since he knew Ste was with Brendan now. Doug thinks to himself at least he cared enough to send me a text to see if I arrived. Doug frowned and stared at the message. He wanted to crawl through the phone and be with Ste right now and just be with him.

His feeling of relief of short-lived. Doug just stares down at his phone. There are so many questions in his mind. "What did I do. Why am I such a bad person?" he says aloud "First it was Becks that was taken now it's Ste and maybe dad." Doug realizes that he is crying. He just continue to stare at the phone as the tears continue to fall.

Doug urges himself, be strong. You will get through this. It may take some time but you'll fix your broken heart.


	4. Chapter 4

Doug was no fan of hospitals. He remembered how much he hated seeing Ste lying in a coma, not knowing if he was going to survive. That nearly tore Doug apart. He remember trying to explain their daddy's condition to Leah and Lucas. It had been so hard.

He proceeded to his father's room. And there was his family. Everybody looked at him as he walked into the room. He only says, "Hi."

Nina Carter looks at her son, "Darling it is so good to see you. I was so afraid that you would not be able to come."

"Of course I came it's dad, " Doug replies.

Doug's two older brothers are standing on the far side of the hospital room. Mike and Thad Carter shared the same dark hair and blue eyes that Doug had. All three brothers looked similar, but Doug's brothers were taller than their baby brother. And both brothers were also married. Camilla was Mike's wife, and Anne was Thad's wife. Doug couldn't ask for better brothers. Mike was the oldest, 7 years older than Doug, and Thad was a year younger than Mike. Doug had always been the apple of his mom's eye. And his brothers had tortured him endlessly for it. Most was in good-natured fun. Doug grew up in the shadows of his two older brothers who always seemed to be smarter, more athletic, and successful.

Doug's dad, Nick Carter, lay in his hospital bed. The doctors were in the process of finishing their tests. Two weeks ago Nick had collapsed while playing golf. Ever since the doctors had been examining him and running every conceivable kind of test.

Nick who is sitting up in bed looks at his baby boy and says, "come over here and give your dad a hug Doug."

Doug immediately walks over and hugs his dad. Nick looks deep into his son's eyes. He knows that something isn't right. But he doesn't say anything.

Camilla pipes up from behind Doug and asks, "So Dougie where's your man."

Doug looks down at the floor unable to speak and shakes his head. Camilla feels terrible and tells him, "Doug, I'm so sorry." Mike and Thad look at their baby brother, and they can see the pain on his face. They have always been protective if not downright over protective of Baby Dougie. Now they see their distraught baby brother who is clearly in so much pain. And there was nothing they could do to fix it.

There is nothing but silence in the room. Nina is the next to speak.

"Doug what happened, the last time we spoke things were so good?" she says. Nick takes his son's hand and holds it as Doug starts to cry. Thad always the diplomat as the middle brother pulls Doug into his arms. Doug breaks down and just weeps. After a few minutes, Doug collects himself and then takes a look around the room at his family.

"I'm sorry I'm such a mess," he says. "We had some major differences. He's there now. I don't think that it's going to work out for us."

The room is quiet again as everyone digests the news. Doug starts to recover a bit. His eyes are puffy from crying. This is supposed to be about his dad. Doug feels guilty for being such a pathetic mess. The voices in his head are interrupted by his dad.

Nick Carter just smiles at his son, "it's okay son. You're home now."

Doug just nods and tries to gather his composure.

Doug tells his family, "Excuse me I need to go to the bathroom, and pull myself together."

Doug leaves Nick Carter's Room. The family members look at one another. Camilla always the bold one, "well this stinks."

Nina replies, "So true, it really stinks."

Thad says, "we are going to have to try to keep his mind off of things. Keep him busy. I know Doug and he can brood on things like this for a long time."

Nick nods and agrees, "You boys keep him occupied. I don't care what you do. He needs some time to heal and figure things out."

Nina looks around, " Agreed I think we all do."


	5. Chapter 5

Later that afternoon, Doug is alone with his parents in the hospital room. Doug is finally feeling a little better. The tears have quit falling. His brother and their wives had gone for the evening. Nina and Nick ask Doug to stay behind for a few minutes. They want to have a heart-to-heart with their son.

Nick looks at his son and says to him, "come sit down here on the side of the bed. I want to talk to you. "Son, relationships aren't easy. Hell, we've all been there. You boys don't know this, but your mother and I went through a rough patch when you were a baby Doug. In fact we separated for five months to work out our problems. Nothing is insurmountable if you are willing to work for it, Doug."

"Dad, I just don't know. He has this ex, and it is all so confusing. And you are here in the hospital. It was all just too much for me. I just don't think that I can be the man he needs."

Nick looks sympathetically at his son. "Doug, you just can't think that way, son. Life is too short. I never thought that I would be lying in a hospital bed in this state. Son, you made a commitment to that boy. You have to honor it. The vows say for better or for worse. We didn't teach you to walk away."

Doug looks deep into his dad's blue eyes, "yes sir, you're right."

Doctor Bailey is at the door. "Am I interrupting?" he asks. Nina responds, "no, doctor, just having a family moment." "Sorry to come by so late, but I have just received the results of your tests. I am sorry it has taken so long. Mr Carter, you have a heart defect which is going to require open heart surgery. We have tentatively scheduled the surgery two days from now."

There is nothing but silence in the room as the Carter Family takes in the news that they had just heard from Doctor Bailey.

"Will my dad be okay afterward?" Doug asks.

Doctor Bailey looks at him. "This type of open heart surgery is very delicate. Your dad is going to need rehabilitation after he leaves the hospital I'm afraid."

"How long?" a worried Nina asks.

"At least three months of physical therapy," Bailey replies.

Doug leaves the hospital that night for his parent's home on Long island. As he sits on the train, he just stares into open space. He hurts in so many ways. Besides the whole Ste thing, now his dad needs open heart surgery and then three months of rehab. Bringing himself back to reality, Doug looks at his phone. There was a single text message, "read your email" was all that was in the text. It was from Ste.

Once Doug got home he got his favorite warm milk and fired up him dad's laptop. Sure enough there was an email from Ste. Doug swallowed a little warm milk and started reading. He imagined it was Ste's voice.

_Dearest Doug,_

_I have never been one for writing because of my dyslexia, but I needed to jot down a few things that I didn't have words for when we are at the airport. I'm not sure that I can say this without breaking down so I'm sending you an email. Not as personal I know but here goes._

_I did not go to Ireland. There is nothing for me there. The chapter of my life with Brendan is closed. It is over. I tried to explain that, but you were having none of that at the airport. I know that you saw him kissing me. I'm sorry that it happened. I did not go into his office expecting him to kiss me. I can't undo that now. I can only apologize and ask for your forgiveness. _

_You have to know one thing. You are everything to me. I am in love with you, Doug. _

_I was scared of going to America. A whole new country and I did not know anyone. It's a bit scary for a village boy from the middle of England. But I was also upset about missing Amy, Lucas, and Leah. I love them like I love you. Going to America would mean I would miss so much with them. I felt like you did not give me a choice. You may not have meant it that way. But I thought that I was being asked to choose. I just couldn't do that. I love you, but I also love them._

As Doug finishes the last sentence, tears roll down his cheeks. I never meant for it to be a choice, he says out loud to himself. It was my insecurity and my jealousy, he says aloud.

_I don't want to go on being without you. I want us to be together again as a couple. I married you and those vows are important to me, and I hope to you. I will do whatever I have to do to make us work again. Don't push me out. I don't think I could take it especially from you. _

_I love you Doug. Please know that. I know that I have said it, but I truly mean it. Like you told me in the airport I will always love you, and I will always be there for you._

_Forever Your Loving Ste_

Doug felt a pain in his side. "What have I done?" He asks. Doug prints out the email and read it over and over again. Tears continued to fall. Doug picked up his phone. It has to be early morning in England by know, he thinks. Okay here goes. Doug texts Ste.

Ste, I just read your email. It was beautiful. I was SO wrong about so much. I let my jealousy and insecurities blind me. I am sorry. I LOVE YOU.

Doug hits send and smiles to himself. Maybe there's a chance to fix this. For the first time in days Doug lets himself relax a little.

An ocean away, it is early morning and Ste is going through his morning routine in the deli. He feels his cell phone buzz. Who is texting me this early, he thinks to himself. He looks down and reads the text message from Doug. He yells in delight. He reads it again and again. For the first time since he left the airport Ste is able to smile.

Writing that email to Doug had not been easy. Ste had sat at the computer for two hours trying to get the words just right. He knew what he had in his heart. He just wasn't sure that he could actually get that into words. Finally, on his third attempt, he let the words flow from the heart. There it was his masterpiece to Doug.

He read Doug's text five more times. It made him feel all warm inside. It was so Doug to write in all capital letters, I LOVE YOU. And that one of the reasons you love him isn't it Ste, he thinks to himself. Hmmm maybe I can find one more surprise for Doug. He says to himself, Suddenly, he snaps his fingers, I've got it," he says.


	6. Chapter 6

Leanne was working behind the counter when Ste came from the back of the shop. She was replacing Doug while he was in America. Ste walks up to her hoping she was say yes to the favor that he was about to ask.

"Leanne," Ste begins," Would you feel comfortable running the deli by yourself for a couple of weeks"

"What" She says.

"I want to go to America to surprise Doug and be there with him and his family during his father's surgery." Ste says

"Oh Ste" she goes, "that's so romantic. Of course I can manage here for a couple of weeks on me own."

Ste gives her a big smile and a hug.

"Thank you so much, Leanne. I think you might have just saved my marriage."

"Oh" as a tear appears in her eye. "You know that I love you and Doug. Happy I can help ya out. True love is so beautiful." She smiles and hugs Ste again.

Ste spends the down time looking for a flight to New York. He is able to find one tomorrow early in the morning that gets him to New York by 11 AM. That's perfect. Come here my little beauty as Ste presses the key to purchase the ticket. "I'm coming Doug. WE aren't done yet," he says to the computer screen with the ticket confirmation.

That night Ste packs his bag and finds his passport. " America, the States," he say out loud as he puts his clothes in his duffel bag. Amy pops in with a questioning look on her face.

"What ya doin, Ste? Goin' somewhere I see." Ste smiles back at her. "Amy, I'm goin' to America to surprise Doug. Put us back together as a proper couple and get my husband back." Amy throws her arms around Ste's neck. "I never knew that you were such a romantic. I am so proud of you," she says. Just behind Amy, Leah and Lucas charge into the room to see their daddy packing his bag. Leah looks up at him, "where are you going, daddy?" Looking down at his kids, he pulls them close to him.

"I'm going on a little trip for a couple of weeks. I am gonna see Daddy Doug in America, Ste says." Leah smiles, "good I miss Daddy Doug. It doesn't feel right without him here with you," she says. Lucas nods and says simply, "miss 'im daddy." Ste just smiles at them. He knows that they missed Doug, but he didn't realize until recently how much of a part Doug had become in all their lives.

"His daddy is sick right now, you understand," Ste says. "So I'm going to help out Daddy Doug," Ste says. Ste nods and reaches out to hug Leah and then Lucas as Amy silently watches.

Leah looks again at Ste, "Make sure when you come home daddy you bring Daddy Doug. Don't forget him and leave him behind," she mockingly scowls at Ste. Ste mockingly salutes here and then tells her, "Come here You," as he starts tickling Leah and Lucas and then Amy joins the melee after Ste starts tickling her. "Gotta include mommy don't we now," he says. Finally, the kids head to bed. He smiles to himself, "Doug, you should be here with us in the floor tickling each other. After it's over, Ste says aloud to the walls, It's just not right without you here, Doug."

The next morning before sunrise, Ste is up in the shower and ready when the cab arrives to take him to the airport. Ste smiles all the way to the airport. He can already feel the butterflies in his stomach. He is anxious and nervous. This is going to work. It has to, he says to himself.

Ste boards the flight and is lucky enough to get a window seat. As the plane takes flight, he whispers, "Goodbye England, I will be back soon." Next to him in the aisle seat is a young man around Ste's age. "So will this be your first trip to the US?" Ste looks at the good looking man with slicked back blond hair and blue eyes. "Yes" he says. "Business or Pleasure," the young man asks. "Uh really neither I'm going to surprise someone," Ste answers. The young man nods, "well that someone is very lucky if you are flying across the Ocean as a surprise" " I'm Blake," he says. "I'm Ste. Please to meet ya" The two men shake hands. "Where are you going when you get to the US," Blake asks. "I am staying in New York City," Ste says. "Cool" Blake answers "I just happen to live in New York in Manhattan." Blake and Ste start to talk about the city, and Ste gets some pointers about the city and how to get around. "So" Blake asks, "If I can ask, what can of a surprise is it?" With a big smile on his face, Ste responds, "I'm going to surprise my husband who is visiting his family." Blake smiles back, "must be true love if you are flying so far just to surprise him." Ste is beaming now. "Yes it is." "Good for you. You two are very lucky," Blake says.

Ste chats with Blake through most of the flight to New York. When the plane touches down, Ste could feel the butterflies. He felt like he needed to throw-up. Ste looked out the window so this was it, America, New York City. "Well," he says to himself, I've made it this far so now gotta press on a little further."

Doug had told him while they were both in England that his father was at a hospital called St. Vincents. So Ste decided that is where he would go. I'm coming Doug, he silently says.


	7. Chapter 7

It was the day of Nick Carter's Surgery. Usually, these surgeries are early morning procedures, but there had been a delay in his dad's blood work so surgery was not scheduled to start until 10:30. Doug was glad. He had some time to get some coffee and maybe try to eat some breakfast. He went to the kitchen and opened the pantry. There on the front shelf a can of tomatoes. Doug was overwhelmed by the memories of Ste and his breakfast favorites, cheese sandwiches and tomatoes.

"You can't think about that now Doug," he says aloud. "You have to be strong for dad and more importantly for mom. You can't think about your problems today."

Doug had been pleased with how his brothers and sisters-in-law and his parents rallied when he broke down in front of them when he first arrived. He thought back to the day of his arrival. God, he thinks, I was a real mess. They had all done a great job to comfort him. But his dad and later on his mom had a short conversation with him before visiting hours ended at the hospital.

Nina Carter had said to him, "Doug, we love you. So please listen to what your father and I have to say before you say anything, please."

Doug nodded and then waited for his parents to continue.

Nina smiles at him and says, "Look honey, we want talk to you without the rest of the family around. I know that you are torn up about your Stephen. And you have every right to feel as you do. But you can't run here and hide when you have problems with your husband." She pauses for a second and then smiles at him. "Wow that sounds so strange when you find yourself saying that to your son," she says.

Doug just smiles at his mom and then looks down in the bed to see his dad is also smiling.

Nina continues, "anyway Doug. When your dad is out of the hospital and goes into rehab we want you to return to England. We have talked about it, and as much as you may want to stay and help us. Your place is there trying to reconcile with your husband."

Nick says to Doug, "son we both saw how much you loved each other when we were in England for that fake wedding to that pretty young girl. I was impressed how he confronted us and stood up for you. That is a brave young man you have there. We saw it his eyes how much he loved you. You can't give up now son. You aren't being fair to him or yourself."

Doug nods and says okay when you are out of the hospital I will make plans to return. I will do my best to work it out with Ste.

Both Nina and Nick are now beaming. "That's what we want to hear. Good Man. Now get out of here your old dad needs to sleep."

The Keurig finishes. Doug snaps back to reality. He downs his morning java and heads out for the train to the city.


	8. Chapter 8

Ste had never really navigated an airport the size of this John F Kennedy Airport before. It seems to be quite confusing to him. He says to himself, well okay I should be looking for a taxi. There must be as stand here somewhere. Finally, he finally finds the taxi stand. Fortunately, the line is not long, and it moves quickly until he is next.

Trying not to sound too rough in his English Accent, he does his best to enunciate to the taxi attendant, "I need to go to St Vincents Hospital please." The cab driver looks at Ste, "St Vincents it is Sir," he says.

Ste was mesmerized by the size of the roads and through the taxi's windows eventually he was able to see Manhattan. This was the city his Doug called home. Wow, it's so huge and so tall. Even London doesn't have buildings on this scale. Ste thought it was truly an impressive sight to behold.

Finally, the cab pulled up to the hospital. Ste handed the driver his credit card, and he paid the fare. Before getting out Ste asked, "is there somewhere close I can purchase flowers?" The cabbie looks back and says, "Sure there is a florist on the corner of the next block." He points in the direction of the shop. Ste says to him, "thank you very much for the lift." Ste takes his bag and walks down to the florist shop.

He is greeted by the woman behind the counter by a young woman. "Can I be of assistance," she asks. Ste replies, "I'm going to St Vincents, and I need some flowers. I would like something cheerful please." "Gotcha," she points to a selection of flowers and says to Ste, "the spring mix should do nicely then." Ste beams when he sees the flowers. "Red, pink, and yellow flowers make a beautiful bouquet, don't you think," the young woman asks. Ste says, "Perfect." He hands her his credit card to pay. With his duffel and his bouquet Ste heads across the street to St. Vincents Main Entrance.

At the front desk, an retired gentleman in a blue blazer is standing at the information desk. "Can I help you son," he asks Ste. "Yes, I'm here to see a patient by the name of Nick Carter," Ste replies. "Lemme check for you here," he says to Ste. "Oh yes, I see him here. It appears that he is in ICU. I'm afraid only family can get into the ICU," he states. Ste was determined, "I am family. He is my father-in-law." "Oh if that is the case, that is fine. Go straight down this hall and take the elevator to the 9th Floor and you can check in with the ICU Nurses," the man says to Ste."

Ste sets off down the hall. The butterflies are back again this time with the force of a nuclear bomb. Okay you've come this far. You have nine floors to go. He reminds himself, I should go to the bathroom and check me self out though before going up. Ste wanted to make a good impression. He took a black blazer from his bag and put it on over his button-down shirt. "You look right smart Ste," he says into the mirror. No once over would be complete if he didn't check his hair. He decided some time ago to let it grow longer since Doug liked it that way. "Finally done," he says, "Hang on Doug I'm almost there."

Ste left the bathroom and went up the elevator to the 9th Floor. The first sign he saw was very clear. No Cell Phones, No Smoking, No Visitors, Family Only.


	9. Chapter 9

Doug's father had been in surgery for an hour. Doug felt emotionally exhausted. His brothers and sisters-in-law were there spread out on the sofas in the tiny waiting room.

Doug's mom, Nina, was just too nervous to sit. Every time she tried she found herself standing up and pacing around the room. Finally, Mike looked at her and told her, "Mom why don't you at least change the scenery and walk down the halls." Her oldest smiled and pointed his head to the door. Nina smiled and let out a small laugh. "Good idea, I think that I will do that," Nina replied. She walked out the door into the hallway.

For his part Doug decided to try and get some sleep. He didn't think that he would be able to sleep. But he decided to try. It took about ten minutes and Doug was completely asleep.

Anne looked at Thad, "I have a good feeling about him, Thad, he's strong. I think he's going to make things work." Thad smiled at his sleeping baby brother and replied, "I know he will Anne. Deep down inside Doug is tough. He's a fighter just like dad." Anne smiles and puts her head on Thad's shoulder.

Ste walked to the ICU Nurses Desk and saw an African-American Woman standing there reviewing some charts.

Ste asked, "excuse me, could you tell me where I could find the family of Mr. Nick Carter?"

She looked at the well-dressed foreigner and said to him, "I'm sorry this floor is reserved for family only." With a cheeky grin, Ste replied, "I am family. I am Mr. Carter's son-in-law. His son, Doug, is my husband." That caused the nurse shake her head and laugh, "why is it the best looking ones are always gay," she says. A bewildered Ste looks at her and says, "excuse me." "Nothing honey, come this way and I'll take you to them," she says.

She moved around the nurses station and sees that he has a duffel bag. She looks at him inquisitively. Ste looks down at the bag and then to the nurse, "I just arrived from England," Ste says to her. "You don't say," she says as she gives him a smile. "Tell you what why don't we leave your bag here behind the nurses station while you are here," she says. Ste smiles at her, "Oh thank you that would be a big help." Ste puts the bag down and then follows her down the hall.

Nina Carter feels like she had worn a path into the hallway. She feels the nerves within her, and she tries to quiet her mind. She rubs her eyes. As she does, She doesn't see Ste and the nurse approaching her. "Mrs. Carter, the nurse says, I have your son-in-law here to see you." Nina looks up and standing before her is this gorgeous young man in a black suit holding a bouquet of flowers. Ste doesn't speak at first. He only smiles at her. Nina says to the nurse, "thank you so much Janice. I appreciate you bringing him down here." Janice pats Ste on the shoulder and returns to her station.

Nina continues to look at Ste. He is here standing in front of me, she thinks. He was taller than she remembered. She could see why her baby had fallen for him. He was handsome. Now, here he was in the flesh. He made the trip from England across the Atlantic to New York City just to be here. She thinks to herself if that is not love then what is? Dougie, you have to see that.

Nina interrupts the silence, "I'm Nina, Doug's Mom. I don't know if you remember me or not" Ste says to her, " I do. It's a pleasure to see you again. I hope that I'm not imposing by coming here." Nina replies, "Of course not...after all...you are family. I know that you and Doug have had some problems." Ste does not say anything only nods his head a little. "What's important is that you are here. Thank you for making the long trip. The waiting room is down here. Doug's there now." Ste hands her the bouquet of flowers. She puts a hand on his cheek and smiles at him. "So very sweet, thank you very much, Stephen" Nina says. "Please call me Ste. I much prefer it, Ste says to her."

Nina opens the door and comes into the small room. Mike says to her, "I thought that you were going to take a walk." She has a serious look on her face. Mike and the rest of the family soon understand the reason for her expression. Ste follows Nina into the room. There was a pregnant pause when time seems to stop and everyone holds a collective breath. Mike whispers, "does he (pointing to a sleeping Doug) know?" Nina shakes her head and quietly speaks , "No it is Ste's surprise." Suddenly the mood in the room brightens as they realize that Ste has come from England to surprise his husband. Camilla whispers to Mike, "Oh My God how Romantic."

Nina motions for Ste to stay where he is. Ste nods and stays in place. Nina approaches a sleeping Doug. She gently rocks Doug and quietly speaks into his ear, "Doug, it's time to wake up." Doug slowly starts to wake up. "Is the surgery over? Is dad okay," a groggy Doug asks. "No honey, he is still in surgery, Nina says to Doug. "Did you have a good nap sweetheart," Nina asks him. "I did," Doug replies, "Ste was there." His mom doesn't say anything only smiles.

Doug looks at his brothers and his sister-in-laws and for some reason they are all smiling. Doug is confused but attributes that to having been asleep. His mom interrupts his thoughts, "Doug, someone is here to see you," she says. "See me," he asks. Nina says, "turn around Doug"

Doug turns to see standing there in his black suit. Doug shakes his head as if it was all a dream. "Hi Doug" is all Ste says. Doug momentarily looks down and gets up from the chair. Doug's eyes have started to fill with tears, and he walks over to meet his husband's outstretched arms.

Doug just lets go of all the pain and hurt and starts to cry. The more he sobs the tighter that Ste embraces him. Doug tries to talk through a tear-strained voice. "Your email…..so beautiful. Now…..here" "Shhh don't cry," Ste says, "baby, I'm here now." Ste wipes the tears away from Doug's Cheeks. "I love you, where you go I go. Don't leave me again Doug. You are my life I don't want to be without you." With tears still flowing from those beautiful blue eyes, Doug doesn't say anything just nods.

Ste guides Doug back to his chair and bends down next to him to speak. "I don't care what has happened in our past. I married you. That commitment means something to me. You mean everything to me. I came here for you and to support you. All of you."

As Doug's family looks on, Doug continues to cry as he looks down at the floor away from Ste.

Doug starts to speak and his voice is filled with remorse. "I am so ashamed so embarrassed. I couldn't be the husband you needed, Doug says."

Shaking his head, Ste puts his hand under Doug's chin and tilts his face upward so he can look him in the eye. Ste says, "Doug, you loved me with all your heart. It was me, not you that failed. I was caught up in my own problems. Too often I could not adequately explain and I took my problems out on you. That wasn't right. I'm so sorry. I had your love and I had no idea how precious it was. It was my fault. Can u ever forgive me? I can't bear the thought of being without you in my life.

Doug looks Ste in the eye and shakes his head. "I did all the wrong things for all the right reasons," Doug says. "I wanted so much for you to be free of your past. But every time I stepped in I made a mess of things."

Ste strokes Doug's check and tells him, "That's not true Doug. It was never you. I was the one who couldn't see what was right there in front of me. It was you who made me want to be a better man, one that was worthy of someone as wonderful as you. You are the one that helped me be a better father to the kids. I can never thank you for all that you've done for me. So don't say you made a mess of things cause I don't think that."

Looking around at Doug's family Ste goes on, "And although I don't know them. I don't think your family thinks you any less a man. I was stupid."

Doug shakes his head and pull Ste close to him. "Don't ever see that. You are not stupid," Doug tells him.

Ste gives him a slight smile, "I am when it comes to love and us. You were right there my everything and I did not see it. That makes be stupid or blind," he says laughing a little to break the mood in the room.

There is a silence. No one is sure what is going to happen next. Ste decides I have to do it. I have to put me whole heart out there. I gotta do this. I traveled here to do this so here goes.

Ste speaks and this time he chokes up a little and tears form in his eyes. "Doug," he pauses and takes Doug's right hand, "I don't want to lose you." And quite defiantly Ste says, "I have no intention of losing you. I'm going to fight for you Douglas Carter. I'm gonna fight for us and our family. This is not our end. I love you. We belong together!"

Doug just looks up deep into Ste's eyes. He can see fire there beneath the tears. Doug always loved that look when Ste's fierce protective instincts took over. He knows that a determined Ste is a forced to be reckoned with when he has made up his mind.

Doug nodded and says, "I want so much to try and put us back together. I think we have so much to talk about. Ste says I'm not going anywhere Doug. I'm here."

There it was Doug thought. He does want us. He wants to be with me. No one else but me. You gotta try, Doug, he says to himself. You love this man like you've never loved anyone before. Don't throw it away. You let love go, and it came back to you. Isn't that what you said to him at the airport?

Doug gives Ste a real smile from ear to ear. Thank you he says to him and pulls him into a kiss. This was not just any kiss. This was one of those passionate kisses that had both Doug and Ste wishing they were anywhere but a hospital waiting room.


	10. Chapter 10

Ste looks at Doug and can't take his eyes off of him. "Wow, he says. I will be feeling that against me lips for the rest of the day and maybe tomorrow as well. Oh God, Doug, I have so missed you."

Forgetting who was around Ste caresses Doug's Cheeks, "save some of that for later under your blankie."

Mike burst out laughing and says. "He still has blankie." He moves over to his baby brother and tussles his hair. "You and blankie always did make quite a couple Dougie," he teases his baby brother. Ste steps into rescue his husband, I love blankie. I love wrapping up in it on those cold, wet English Nights. I wouldn't trade blankie for anything."

Doug starts to blush a little, but he didn't care. Ste was here now. Everything was going to be okay.

Doug looks down and there is Ste looking into his eyes. Doug thinks, he had that look that said I am here and I am here to stay.

As Ste held Doug's hand, he couldn't help feeling like it had all been worth it. He was here where he was supposed to be with Doug.

After the emotional welcome, Ste moves to sit down next to Doug.

Ste looks at his brothers-in-law who have walked over to them. "Blimey Doug, I didn't realize ya whole family was so good lookin.' What did ya mum feed all ya? Ste jokingly asks. Doug kisses Ste on the cheek, "It's just good genes baby," Doug says smiling at his brothers. Thad says to Ste, "You must be something really special. I've never seen Baby Dougie here so taken with anyone." Ste turns to look and teases him, "Baby Dougie, I like that."

Finally, Ste gets up and excuses himself to head to the restroom.

Doug yawns a little and turns to speak to his mom not noticing Mike's signal to Thad. Both brothers leave the room following Ste down the hall.

Mike calls out to Ste who is a few paces ahead of them. "Ste, could we talk to you a second?"

Ste turns around wondering if they were mad about how he had treated their brother. Well if I take a little abuse, I certainly earned it he mutters to himself. I made a mess of things. I made me bed so I guess I gotta lie in it.

Mike is the first to speak. "That was a brave and wonderful thing you did in coming here. I know that Doug loves you. We can see it in his eyes and the way he talks about you. Thad and I have talked about this, and we want to try and help." He pauses and Thad jumps in. "Ste, we are just concerned. Our baby brother was in pieces when he got here. He had to face all of us and had to tell us that his relationship with you was over. As an older brother, you hate it when your kid brother is hurting," Thad says. "We just don't want to see him like that again. Do ya understand?' Mike asks looking sympathetically at Ste.

Ste chokes up a bit. He looks at them again and looks down. "I broke him, and I cannot undo that. It kills me knowing how much he hurts. I don't know what to say except I'm sorry and I will do everything in my power to treasure him now and in the future." Ste says. "I love Doug. And although you don't know me, I hope you can see that I love him."

Mike nods and says, "We saw you in there with him. That's real love! I….we just want you to know where we are coming from, Mike says. "I am older than Doug by seven years. When he was a baby, I helped my mom change his diapers. Thad and I have always been over protective of him. We didn't like the thought of him staying in England and much less getting married to a man that we had never met. We confronted our parents about our concerns. Mom told us how you stood up for Dougie when dad came down on him when he was going to enter into a sham wedding. She knew at that time. She said she saw it in you how much you loved our Doug. And from what I just witnessed in that waiting room I saw something that was beautiful between the two of you." Mike says to Ste.

Thad picks up by telling Ste, "We want to support you. Yes, we are his overprotective big brothers and will always be when it comes to Doug. I guess what we are asking you, please if you feel you are not in this with Doug for the long haul then don't lead him on. Don't shower him with words if you are not fully committed to being with him."

Ste looks both brother in their eyes. They have the same eyes as Doug, and that makes what he was about to say so much more difficult. "Mike, Thad, thank you for being honest. I haven't given you much of a reason to trust me up to this point. I do have a past, and some of it is not pretty. I have made mistakes in my relationship with your brother. It took me too long to fully understand how deeply and completely I loved him. That was my fault. But my eyes are open. I don't know what the future holds for us. I want it to work. I have been honest with myself. Doug may be too hurt to give me a real second chance. If that is the case, I will have to live with that. I will always love him. Like I told your dad, Doug is one of the good ones. Whether we are together or not, I will always want to protect him and keep him from harm."

Both Thad and Mike smile, and hug Ste. Mike adds, "welcome to America, Ste. We want you to feel like you are a part of the family." Thad nods in agreement.

"Thanks Thad and Mike," Ste says, "I will take you up on that. Any family that loves and support their son as much as the Carters is a family that I would like to be a part of," Ste says to the brothers.

With that said there is silence until Ste blurts out, "So where is the loo again," Ste asks.

Mike smiles at him. "Down the hall on the right. If you see Janice you've gone too far."

Ste smiles and heads off to the restroom.

Mike turns to his brother and quietly says, "That went well, don't you think?"

Thad replies, "Mike, he seems like a good guy. I'm glad that we did not have to put the fear of God in him. I think that he truly loves Doug. It's Doug I'm more concerned with. I hope he is going to be able to see through his pain to give Ste a second chance. I mean a real second chance."

Mike smiles at his brother and says, "well, we will have to do all we can to convince our baby brother that Ste is for real. Deal?"

Thad replies, "Deal. Who would have thought two married straight guys would ever be playing matchmaker for their gay baby brother? I feel like we are living on a soap opera."

Mike smiles put his arm around his brother's shoulder and they head back to the waiting room


	11. Chapter 11

Later that day, Mike tells the family he has hotel rooms for them so they can easily return to the hospital. Ste is resting his head on Doug's shoulder barely able to keep his eyes open.

Nina tells Doug that Ste has been up for so long. After all he is still on British Time. She tells Doug to take him to the hotel for the night.

Doug argues I have no clothes with me. Ste jumps in. "'s okay you can wear some of mine."

Doug just smiles at Ste. Okay, let's get your bag and go. Doug grabs Ste by the hand and leads him to gather his bag at the nurses station.

An hour later an exhausted Ste and Doug are laying in bed at the hotel. Ste leans over and kisses Doug on his forehead. "What was that for?" Doug asks. "Cause I wanted to," Ste replies. "I cannot believe that you came up with this whole surprise, and you are here." Doug says. "Well why not, Doug," Ste replies, "I am a bit of a romantic at hear you know." Doug smiles and gives Ste a peck on the lips.

They both fall asleep with Doug's arm wrapped around Ste. Ste just smiles. This is where I am meant to be, he thinks to himself. And then he drifts off.

The next few days are spent going back and forth to the hospital seeing Doug's father and hearing updated reports from the doctor. Fortunately, Doug's dad was in good shape so the recovery was going to much easier than first thought. By the fourth day, he was up and walking down the halls. He was also moved into a regular private room outside the ICU. That made visiting him much easier.

Late afternoon Ste, Doug, and Nina were sitting around Nick's bed. They have been through the usual litany of questions regarding his comfort, his water needs, hunger, etc. Nick feels strong enough and wants to talk to Doug and Ste.

"So Ste you flew across the Atlantic to be here. Well that is a heck of a surprise. I want to say thank you. When Doug got here, I didn't think you had it in you." Nick says. Nina interjects, "Nick, really he flew thousands of miles. Give him a break." Ste says, "no please say what you want to say. I did fail in my duties to your son." Nick says, "Ste, I'm not judging you in fact if anything I'm impressed. I have been since you stood up to me in England. I am just an over protective dad much like Doug's brothers. I did not want him in a sham wedding. I can accept that my son is gay. And it doesn't change my love for him. But what I want to know from you, Ste, are you ready for a long-term relationship with Doug?"

Doug pipes up, "Dad, come on that's not a fair question. You're putting Ste on the spot, don't you think?" Ste replies, "No Doug, your dad is absolutely right. He loves you and wants to know my intentions. That is fair. Mr. Carter" "Please it's Nick," Doug's dad says. Ste goes on, "Nick, I am in love with your son. But just so you know it is the first normal relationship I've ever really had in me life." Nick and Nina both look at him perplexed. Ste says more quietly, "I am a survivor of abuse. My mum and her boyfriends abused me. And the man who was my first real lover was also abusive. I don't say this for your pity but so you know who I am and where I come from. It hasn't been easy for me, and I know that Doug here has had to be endlessly patient with me." Ste pauses so the Carters can comprehend what he is saying.

Nina says, "you're so young. It sound like you've endured so much by people that were supposed to love you." Ste nods and goes on, "I thought that love meant very little affection and more frequently a smack across the face. It's quite amazing how we adapt in life." He pauses briefly and then starts again. "I remember as a boy seeing other little boys so happy with their mum and dads." Ste's eyes fill with tears. "I remember being 6 standing on the playground after school. All of the other parents were there hugging their kids and taking them off home. One by one they all left. There I stood alone on the playground, no mum or dad. I remember thinking why couldn't I have a mum and dad that would show up for me. Why did they not love me like the other kids? So I walked home alone that night. And I remember that I just cried and wondered what did. Why did no one love me? I never forgot that."

Doug comes over to him and pulls him to his feet and pulls him into a tight embrace. Doug has teared up listening to Ste's story, and he whispers into Ste's ear, "I'm so sorry. I never knew." Ste replies, "I never wanted you to now. I never wanted anyone to see how broken I am. I wanted it all to be in the past. I wanted. I still want to let it go. I don't want it to haunt me….us."

Nina also has tears in her eyes and Nick has a look of concern on his face. Nina speaks, "you poor thing. No child deserves that. I'm so sorry for what happened to you." Ste looks over to her and says, "thank you, Nina. But like I said it is part of who I am. I just don't want it to define who I will be in the future." Nick smiles, "Good for you Ste." Doug looks at his father and mother and says, "You see why I love him." He strokes Ste's cheek and says to them, "You see why I want to be with him. Like you said mom and dad after I arrived, relationships are not easy. Life is not like on tv." Ste looks at Nina and Nick, "I want to be a better man, one that is worthy of your son and me kids." Nick says, "Well Ste, I know we cannot make up for the past. But I want you to know that you are a part of our family now. We are far from perfect, but we love all our children and their spouses."

"Should we ask them now," Nick asks. Nina replies, "yes this seems like a perfect moment. We are all family here so let's ask. Nick looks at Ste and Doug, "I've talked to Nina about this and we would like to be grandparents to your kids if you will have us." Nick says to Ste and Doug. Ste has a huge smile from ear to another. "Really. You mean it. Absolutely, I will need to talk to Amy, the kid's mum. But I don't think she will take much convincin'." He walks over to Nina and gives her a hug and kisses her on the cheek then he bends down and hugs Nick. "Doug, what ya think? Can they manage with our Leah and Lucas?" Ste quips. Doug laughs and says, "Yes it will give them some much needed practice when Mike and Thad start having babies." Nina gives him a smirk, "Do you know something Douglas?" Nina asks. "No, no, no I know nothing. And I'm not asking two already over protective brothers about their sex lives with their wives."


	12. Chapter 12

It has been a week since Nick's surgery. Ste and Doug have settled into a new routine. At first going from the hotel to the hospital, however, for the last two days they stayed at the Carter House and traveled to the hospital.

Thad asks Doug to come by the hotel and have a drink with his brothers. The brothers decided that the boys needed some quality time together. Doug is unsure about leaving Ste alone. Thad tells him it's only for a couple of hours. Ste reassures his nervous husband and insists that Doug join his brothers. "Go it will be good to spend some time with your brothers. You don't see them often. I will be alright here with your parents." Ste says. In fact, this is perfect since Ste wanted to have a talk with Nina and Nick without Doug present.

Once Doug is gone, Ste pops back into Nick's hospital room. "Nick and Nina, could I have a few minutes?" Ste asks. Nicks says, "what's on your mind son?" Ste smiles at being called son by his father-in-law. "Just to follow-up on our chat the other day, I talked to Amy, my kids' mum. She is ecstatic with the idea of your being grandparents to them. So I want to make it official, will you Nick and Nina be grandparents to Leah and Lucas?" Ste says.

Nick and Nina tell Ste yes they would love to be their grandparents.

"But I'm not quite done yet," Ste says, "Well I think you know by now how much I love your son. And I want to do the right thing by Doug. And I know it is old-fashioned, but I want to ask for Doug's hand in marriage. We had a civil partnership in England. But what I'm talking about is a real church wedding with your family there. Doesn't have to be fancy. I just want Doug to be able to get married with all of you there."

Nina and Nick are overjoyed at the prospect of a wedding to see their baby boy get married. They give Ste their blessing.

Ste says to them, "I want to do it right. So if you don't mind I would like to ask him here with the whole family around. That'll keep me honest." Ste laughs.

Nick says, "OK Ste, let's do it. But we want one thing as well. We want to see Amy and those grandkids here for the wedding. You think you can convince her to come to America. We will get the tickets so don't worry about that. They can stay at the house as well."

Ste is flabbergasted and unable to speak for a second. "Are you sure really sure?" he asks. Nick says, "well they are family too Ste. It wouldn't be right for their dads to have a real wedding without them there, would it?" Nina nods and agrees with her husband.

At this point, Ste is over the moon. "That settles it. I will talk to her, and we will set it up." Ste says to the Carters.

It's just about time for Doug to return, and he is almost always on time. "Please keep this to yourselves. I wanna surprise Doug." Ste asks. Nick says, "I think that we can honor that request."

Ste hugs both Nina and Nick. "Thank you for being amazing parents," Ste says to them. Nina notices he doesn't say in-laws. She thinks good he is starting to feel accepted and loved. Healing can really begin. We trust him. Now he can more readily trust us. Nick just says, "you are welcome Ste. You're a good boy." Ste blushes a bit and thanks him.

Minutes later Doug is at the door. After a couple of drinks with the brothers, he is a bit woozy. Ste points at him, "My husband, poor thing, just cannot hold his liquor." They all have a little laugh at Doug's expense. Doug comes over and kisses Ste, "Did ya miss me?" he asks. "Doug you were only gone 2 hours." Ste replies. He can see Doug frowning. "But a course I did," Ste says. That elicits a smile from Doug. Doug asks about his dad. They tell him that all is well and that he and Ste should go home. Before leaving Nick winks at Ste and gives him a nod.

Nina and Nick talk about the unexpected proposal after they leave.

Nick I can honestly say that I couldn't be any happier for Doug and for us. "He is going to be a fine son-in-law." Nick says. "And we are now grandparents," Nina adds.

They smile at each other.

Nina says, "first thing first, we have to get you out of here. This wedding is not going to happen in a hospital room if I have anything to say about it."


End file.
